You’re Steele the One for Me – 7

We left Laura on the way to call the office.


Ah. “Call the office” is a euphemism, it seems.


It appears that they bus the dirty dishes to the outside of the restroom at this place. That doesn’t seem too sanitary.


Oh, it’s one of those classy joints with a pay phone in the toidy. Laura digs for a dime. Perhaps after she calls the office, she can get in touch with the county health inspector. I think there are some violations here! But before Laura can do her public service in the public restroom …


A hand reaches in and pulls out the phone cord! Hey, that’s no lady!


It’s a big, white-haired man!

It’s clear this suspect really IS Santa Claus, albeit with shaved beard to conceal his identity. He managed to materialize in this small ladies room without Laura noticing him open the door three feet from her. In fact, since the door swung shut slowly when Laura entered, and it’s fully closed behind this guy, it’s apparent that Santa didn’t even enter through the door. Presumably he came down the chimney.


You’re not fooling anyone, Mr. Kringle.

In any case, he’s sorry to inform Laura the phone is out of order.


“In that case, thanks for saving me the dime.”  You’re one cool customer, Miss Holt.

Not St Nick wants to know if Laura remembers him.


“Kenji Ito’s funeral, wasn’t it?” she responds. “But there was such a crowd there, I might be mistaken.”


“No mistake, Miss Holt.”

You can tell this is a bad guy because of his evil eyebrows.


See? You can always tell by the eyebrows.


“Naming names, are we? Did you bring yours along, or do I have to go looking for it?”  Laura wants to know.


Santa presents his credentials. “”Craddock, Winslow. Major, Army, Special Intelligence,” Laura reads. You’re out of uniform, soldier!

She wants to know if it’s legit.


“Use your dime,” Major Eyebrows suggests. Aw, after you broke the phone? That’s just mean.

Laura points out that he obviously wanted to see her. (Or maybe the men’s room is full?)


“I had that little gun-running flea Kenji tight between my fingers. And I only let him go because I knew it would lead to the Palace of Heaven. His death doesn’t change that. It’s still mine.”

randomalertGun-running flea? What does that even mean?

Laura isn’t impressed with Major Eyebrows’ bluster.


“Palace of Heaven. What’s that?”

Sounds like a brothel to me.


“Come on. Stupid doesn’t suit you, Holt,” he snarls. “Just give it to me and get out while you still can.”

Wow. Santa seems a lot nicer during the holidays.


“”You trying to tell me this ladies’ room isn’t big enough for the both of us?”

Well, I’m pretty sure he’d have to use the handicap stall.


behindthescenesThe familiar cliché, “This town ain’t big enough for the both of us” comes from the 1932 film, “The Western Code.” (Columbia Pictures). It starred early cowboy hero Tim McCoy. Here’s a clip!


Kindly Major Eyebrows warns Laura that he doesn’t like to see civilians hurt.

“Is that a threat?” she asks, rather unnecessarily. (I’m pretty sure it is.)

“Consider yourself lucky. If Tenaka had found you first, he’d take a finger. And then turn nasty. Dwell on it.”

snarkwarning “Dwell on it?”  Who wrote this episode? Wait: Robert Butler and Michael Gleason? I’m disappointed, guys.


Major Eyebrows backs … slowly … out … the … door. As a military man, he knows always to keep the enemy covered with your most potent weapon. In this case, his menacing eyebrows.

It works!


Laura, visibly shaken, is left to Dwell.On.It.

Perhaps I’m a particularly snarky mood because it’s Valentine’s Day and I’m alone, but I found this sequence a little lame. Still, we found out a few things: Kenji was a gun-running flea, military intelligence is on the case, the ladies’ room at Mike Ito’s sushi bar doesn’t get much business (have you ever been in a ladies room for five minutes without somebody else coming in?), something called the Palace of Heaven is VERY IMPORTANT, whoever Tenaka is doesn’t like fingers, and even Gleason and Butler can have an off week.






Filed under Season 1

2 responses to “You’re Steele the One for Me – 7

  1. eaz35173

    Yes, why is there a phone inside the bathroom? Who wants to overhear THAT kind of business? And I find it very creepy that Major Evil Eyebrows has just appeared in the ladies room. Part of me was worried for Laura when I first saw this scene. Glad he only ripped out the phone cord. The fact that he told her that stupid didn’t suit her, implies to me that he has been watching her – that he knows what she’s capable of. Again, this didn’t sit well with me either. But, as you pointed out, we do learn some potentially pertinent details here.

    I would think gun running fleas would have to be very strong … or run with very tiny guns 😉

  2. Even with the creepy guy and dull scenes, I love the noir undertones. Laura is holding her own against this Creepy Santa while in the bathroom (of all places). This is the second creepy guy in the series: the first was the blind guy in Steele Waters Run Deep. Hope they eliminate this creepy guy thing in the rest of the series.

    I seem to remember that buildings older than than the 1950s had telephones in the bathroom foyer.

    Yeah this is my least favorite episode. I didn’t like the guest characters, plot, or slow movement.

    Your random alert on gun running fleas is great.

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